Be your own boss. Never follow the crowd. These are both good pieces of advice that you will hear from many people. And yet, many people do not follow that advice. If it is so common, and sounds like the right thing to do, then why do not so many people not do it? A lot of that is because of fear, comfort, and uncertainty.

Fear is a tricky emotion. It can help us stay out of very dangerous situations and know when to be careful. But fear can also keep us from doing things that we truly want to do. Many people stay at jobs they hate, live in places they do not want to live, and do things every day that they do not want to do out of fear. They are afraid of what might happen if they make a change or if they disappoint certain people, like their parents or friends.

To get past this fear, you need to be able to see yourself as a leader and know how to learn from your mistakes. When you are in a bad situation or do something wrong, it is important not to look down on yourself. Instead, focus on what you can learn from what happened and how it can help you grow. Leaders and bosses are never perfect, but they are always learning.

Being comfortable sounds like a good thing. We want to sit in comfortable chairs and lie down in comfy beds. But when we are too comfortable in a chair or bed, we do not want to get up. That can be the same problem when following the crowd. People stay in jobs they do not really want or live a life they do not want to live because even though it is not what they want, it is at least comfortable. Being comfortable can mean getting stuck.

It is important to focus on the present. You need to think of whether you are really happy with what is happening in your life right this moment. Start getting out of your comfort zone with small decisions in your life. Look for little things where you have trouble trusting yourself. For example, you might always let your friends decide where to go for food. Take charge by being the one to say where you will eat. These small decisions, if done regularly, will help you realize what you really want and that you can make big things happen for yourself.

Uncertainty can be the toughest thing to face for many people. Even if we are brave and trust ourselves, we never know for sure what will happen if we quit a job, change the way we live, or move to a whole new city. There are no guarantees that things will get better. When we do not know what the outcome will be, we can be too afraid to take any steps. When we follow the crowd and play it safe, we may not be happy, but at least we know what tomorrow will look like.

Focus instead on embracing the unknown. There might be a lot of risks, but there are a lot of advantages to making changes. Focus on that and use that positive thinking to keep moving forward. When we get caught up in the unknown, our brains will come up with all the ways things can go wrong and keep us from making the changes we need. Do not waste time thinking about what could happen. Make things happen instead.

When people end up following the crowd, it is not because they really want to or because they really chose to do it. They are giving in to fear, comfort, and uncertainty. When you are aware of these three problems and take the time and energy to stand up to them, you can be your own boss. “Follow your heart” sounds simple but is never easy. Start putting in the work and effort now, and your future self will thank you.

Sources:

Ishak, Raven. “9 Ways to Stop Second-Guessing Yourself & Trust Your Own Decisions.” Bustle. https://www.bustle.com/articles/163531-9-ways-to-stop-second-guessing-yourself-trust-your-own-decisions

Meyer, Sean. “Here’s What Happens When You Don’t Follow the Crowd.” Be Yourself. https://byrslf.co/heres-what-happens-when-you-don-t-follow-the-crowd-de4bbf669279