Everyone goes through difficult times- it’s a part of life. To get through it, we need lots of support from friends and family. Think back to when you went through a difficult time; who was there for you? Remind yourself of the kind things that person did for you. Nobody wants to be alone, especially in tough situations when we need someone to be there for us, to support us, to love us. That’s what makes us come out of the dark times. If a friend is experiencing this, you need to be supportive and kind to them to help them through a tough time.

In my experience, friends need all the support they get. Whether they’re having a tough time at school, at home, at work, or something else, support means more than you think. Just simply being there for them, asking if they’re okay, what you can do to help means a lot to them. Try imagining what their going through and their perspective on the things that they are facing; this helps you to understand how they’re feeling and how difficult it must be for them.

Often people just need someone to listen to them without judgement. Unless your friend asks for advice, try to avoid giving it out freely. Your friend may feel as though you are judging them rather than supporting them, so it’s important to listen to your friend. If they ask for your advice, give them your honest opinion based on what would be best for the situation they’re experiencing.

If your friend asks you to give them space, you must listen. Whether you understand what they’re going through or not, your friend knows what’s best for them. However, make sure they know that you’re there for them when they’re ready to talk and that you’re fully able to listen.

Another way to easily help your friend is by surprising them by doing acts of kindness. It does not have to be a grand gesture, just any small thing that reminds your friend that you love and care about them. Maybe write a small text reminding them that you’re there for them, or buy them something small like their favourite chocolate bar, or make them a card.

It’s also really important to make sure you’re not making their problems seem easy to go away or that it doesn’t matter; all feelings and emotions are valid! Saying things like, “It’s not a big deal” will make your friend feel as if the problems they’re facing don’t mean much to you and that they are feeling upset when they shouldn’t, but it’s the opposite. Rather, say something like, “It makes sense how you’re feeling that way”. Ask them if they’re okay. If you notice a friend seems to be getting more upset, simply ask them if they are all right. It shows that you care, and it will mean a lot to them. It’s a simple way to let them know that you’re there for them if they need you.

Lastly, if you think your friend is in danger, I can’t stress enough how important it is for you to seek help from a trusted adult. Avoid taking all of the problems on yourself, as it can be a lot of stress on you, especially if you feel like it’s your responsibility to take on what they’re going through, which it’s not. Being there and helping your friend is different than taking on their problems as your own. Talk to your parents first if that option is available to you. If it’s not, contact a neighbour, doctor or family. There are countless hotlines like Kids Help Phone available you can contact; you are never alone. If you seek immediate help, call emergency services in your area. While it’s important to be there for your friend, understand that what your friend is experiencing is not your fault. Try to avoid absorbing their feelings and emotions otherwise, it will result in you feeling down as well.

Keep all of these things in mind while helping a friend having a hard time. Being delicate and respectful of your friends should be priorities, especially when you are helping them through a difficult time.

References:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/7-ways-to-support-others-during-tough-times_b_7270550

https://kidshelpphone.ca/get-info/how-help-friend-through-rough-patch

https://www.sweetyhigh.com/read/how-to-help-friend-going-through-a-tough-time-010919