What’s Your Edge?
Check Your Communication Style
Practice the Art of Reading Your Own Communication Style
“ And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful then the it took to blossom.” Anais Nin
In the famous book, “ The Art of War” Sun Tzu describes the 3 paradigms of being as :
- How you see yourself,
- How others see you,
- The true reality between one and two.
In today’s fast paced business environment we have lost the ability to understand how we truly show up on stage. This is not because we are lazy or ignorant: the answer lies in the fact that we have never been formally taught how to clearly and intentionally communicate.
Your true edge starts with your ability to first understand your communication and style, using it then to impact others. There are many intelligent and knowledgeable people out there with one major flaw: they are unable to stand out in a crowd and differentiate themselves. Humans, by nature, are people of adaptation and habit. For example, if we see a successful business person doing certain things and behaving in a certain way we may think that if we mimic that style or pattern then we too will become successful, WRONG
Breathing and communicating have one thing in common: “ you are doing it all the time even if you never say a thing , you are still communicating.”
Although we can indeed learn valuable tools from successful individuals, they are just that,- individuals. During a networking event a distressed woman began speaking with the circle of people around her saying “ I just don’t understand it . I can say the exact same thing, the exact same way as a co-worker of mine does to my boss , and, he always laughs it off when they say it, but takes it seriously from me!” Our focus in this article is to have you check how good you are at reading your self. ( This is not the same as how you see yourself in the mirror every day. This view is cluttered with ego and self beliefs. ) . No training will teach you these skills . They come from your own self-awareness and ability to see outside of yourself and your limiting beliefs.
Breathing and communicating have one thing in common, you are doing it all the time ,even if you never say a thing. You are still communicating . The danger is in being unaware that both are an imperative necessity to you quality of life.
When you leave a room , what conversation is left behind about you ? This is an interesting question. It has been said that people will never remember what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel. When you enter or exit a room what are people saying about you . Today, it is important to know. Let’s start with the major component to communication that makes up the fabric of your success. Body Language and Listening Skills makes up 90% of your communication. It involves your posture, eye contact, attention span and ability to listen at a level much deeper than surface conversation. Are we actually listening ? Or are we waiting for the other person to take a breath so that we can jump in ?